School Refusal Therapy in Bergen County
Is your child refusing to go to school?
Therapy can help reveal the reason behind their defiant actions
- Your child refuses to enter the school building or classroom
- Your child simply won’t get out of bed in the morning
- Your child cries, throws tantrums, or physically complains about going to school
- Your child will not leave the house or get out of the car for school
- Your child is afraid something bad will happen to them while they are at school
- Your child complains of headaches, stomach aches or upset stomach but is fine on weekends
- Your child is clinging to you at school dropoff
- Your child frequents the school nurse
While you think your child may be disobedient, their actions are driven by something more complex. If your child, tween or teen displays any of the above signs, therapy may be helpful in uncovering the factors that are driving their willful behavior.
Causes of school refusal
Although more common among the younger group, school refusal can occur in children of any age for a variety of reasons. Every child is unique, but typical issues behind school refusal include:
- Anxiety – Fear is a prevalent factor in school refusal. There is the fear of being separated from a loved one, worry about how others will judge them, and concerns over academic or athletic performance. For some children, such fears can be so paralyzing that they simply cannot face going to school.
- Depression – This is more common among older students. When a teen is feeling so low, the thought of attending school seems exhausting and overwhelming. Lacking the energy or motivation to go to class, they may fake being sick, stay in bed, or simply refuse to leave the house.
- Bullying – Being bullied is another common trigger of school refusal. Children want to stay home because they are scared of physical or emotional harm, being humiliated in front of their peers, or out of shame over their inability to stand up to the bullies.
- Life Transitions – Often school refusal can be the result of a traumatic life change, such as starting a new school, moving to a new city, parents divorcing, and illness or loss of a loved one.
- Lack of Interest – Some students simply have an extreme lack of interest in the academic subjects. This leads them to feel unmotivated and struggle in finding the value to attend school in general.
Getting to the root of the oppositional behavior
School refusal can be extremely difficult for both your child and your family. The first step toward getting back on track is to find out the real reasons why they are struggling. During our sessions, we’ll assess the behaviors associated with your child’s actions and develop a rapport so they feel comfortable expressing their thoughts and emotions. Some children have difficulty communicating, and that’s OK. Our team is trained in using play therapy to help children open up and share what they are thinking and how they are feeling. We may incorporate the use of toys, puppets, games, arts & crafts, dance and movement, and other fun activities. For tweens and teens, we offer a relaxed, non-judgmental space where they are free to explore their needs and be open about how they are feeling.
A customized therapeutic treatment plan
Once we have discovered the real reasons your child does not want to go to school, we’ll develop a therapy course of action that will teach them to identify their triggers and how to respond to them through coping techniques like self-talk and calming strategies. We’ll also work with you as the parent to help understand and support your child, as well as modify any parenting styles that may be contributing to the issues underlying the school refusal.
Our goal is to help your child:
- Resume normal school attendance
- Develop healthy thoughts and expectations about school
- Reduce avoidance behaviors
- Be more comfortable in the school environment